So much love to give, so little time. Even adding one extra relationship can feel overwhelming to an already busy life. When I even think of meeting someone and them desiring my time (as I wish to give to them) it feels daunting because TIME is limited. I want to love everyone and yet how can I squeeze it all in?
When we reach our capacity and it feels stressful to introduce another lover into our lives …. you may be Polysaturated. As humans I believe we have infinite love to share and then there’s that silly inconvenient construct of time in which we are limited. Polysatured occurs when you’re feeling at capacity with spending time / investing energy or seeking out new Lover(s)… or engaging with your Metamours.
Not only can we be overwhelmed when we have multiple relationships and are having to manage scheduling, attention, quality time, dates, communication, feelings, intimacy… we also have our own Self that needs nourishment and down time.
Do you set aside time and prioritize your Self, the way you do your Beloved(s)? I believe Self care and Self love rituals are imperative for us polyamorous folks.
• Perhaps consider pausing on seeking new Lovers when saturated
• Create a ritual where you unplug and have downtime all to yourself with a pleasure-centered relaxation based non-activity
• Discuss with current Lover(s) about how you will all know when you are polysaturated and what type of support you’ll all need and what that specifically looks like
Polyamory doesn’t mean you need to always be open to new Lovers or that you need to have as many Lovers as possible. Take your time and practice being intentional. The balance and peace of your life matters and impacts you directly… which impacts your Lovers.
Feeling Polysaturated doesn’t suggest something negative abut you or the way you practice polyamory. It’s a signal for us to pause, check-in with Self and care for our Selves with as much compassion as we care for our Lover(s).
Wishing you all the loves and many loves,
Fox Eros, M.A., Therapist (AMFT)
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