Not being interested in adult playtime can have a variety and complexity of reasons. For those who used to be interested and aren’t anymore, one reason could be that playtime just isn’t fun or enjoyable anymore.
So my question for you is, what do you need now to make it good or better? We change, our lives change, our partners change, our relationships change, our bodies change, as does our desire. If you aren’t sure what you like or need now, can you prioritize exploring and finding out or even invite your Lover(s) to help you find out?
1. Sometimes when we put off sex or don’t feel interested - it could be because the sex isn’t ‘good’ 2. ‘Bad sex’ may feel like a chore, feel too fast, isn’t fun or pleasurable, or feels disconnected, uncomfortable or boring 3. You can advocate for ‘better sex’ with your Lover(s) by learning, communicating & prioritizing what brings you pleasure & joy
Once you begin putting the pieces in place, you can try having a gentle and compassionate conversation with your Lover(s). Sharing feedback and desires about playtime can be vulnerable for everyone so let it be an open dialogue in a safe and calm environment where they can share their desires and feedback as well.
Now look at us! We’re doing a thing over here learning about communication and pleasure!
Fox M., Therapist (AMFT) lovelifeandfox.com
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