I have learned that desire is not only a responsive or spontaneous feeling inspired by outside forces. It can actually be cultivated within you and expanded upon.
Can you focus on what turns you on and as you pay attention to that feeling… turn it up within your Self? Can you pay attention to feelings, longings and body sensations that are created when you are aroused? Pause in your desire. Feel it? Now breathe deeply into your thoughts, emotions and sensations and lean in. Perhaps to start… try this with a song that moves you. Desire can begin in YOUR body. YOU are expanding experiences into desire. I find this to be very sensual and erotic.
Our Sexual Self begins with us and THEN we share it… and invite our Lovers in. And this requires that we allow joy and pleasure into our lives and then we explore / identify our needs, communicate them… and be there for our Lovers as they do the same. And this isn’t always easy or comfortable. Especially if you have experienced trauma. In this case pleasure and joy can feel foreign, maybe even threatening. You are worthy of allowing AND being present for pleasure.
As we embrace our Sexual Self we become empowered and yes - this is an act of radical liberation in our society that strives to control and diminish our natural glorious bodies and sexuality.
We own our Sexual Selves for always. You own your Self you GLORIOUS EROTIC BEING!
This seductive art @rudd_san
Fox M., Therapist (AMFT)