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When Shame Keeps You Stuck

  • Writer: Fox Eros
    Fox Eros
  • Jul 21, 2025
  • 2 min read

Updated: Oct 8, 2025


Shame is a prison. It keeps us from processing what’s happened and what there is to learn within Self and between others. Secrets, mistakes and fear-based projections from others aren’t meant to lock us into perpetual boxes. We are human and we need to learn in order to grow… and we will ABSOLUTELY make more mistakes for as long as we live. Be it in monogamy, polyamory, friendships, family, work.  All of it. It becomes a wall that blocks us from connection and intimacy, as we don't believe we are good enough to receive.


What is essential is that we acknowledge how we could have done better, that we tend to the wounds of those we’ve harmed with powerful accountability, honor our own wounds and share our “shame” stories with those who can hold space for us — so we may begin to release shame.



We are here to evolve and we are worthy of forgiving our Selves. We are also here to forgive others and that does’t equate to allowing them in our lives, as that may not be a possibility or be safe. But it does mean making space to let them go with compassion so we may find our way back to our Self. Anger is valid and necessary but holding on for great lengths of time can be exhausting. It taxes our spirit and weighs on our wellbeing creating resentment and torment. We must let go and that is an ongoing practice. Please do so with tenderness, as it isn’t easy. And know this — you are precious, not perfect.


We need our energy to continue our evolution. We can do better and we will do better. Our many trips around the sun will be filled with stories, mishaps, making love, stank moods, fire passion and bedazzled star dreams. All of it. This is being human. We are messy star dust. Fantastic and devastating with moments of hurt and droplets of bliss.


You are enough. You are forgiven. Find your way back to your Self and begin again loves. And again... and again.


🌹 Fox Eros, M.A., Therapist (AMFT) Book a Consultation


*Disclaimer: This blog content is for informational & educational purposes only, NOT as a substitute for professional therapy.



"We will reclaim our Self worth, body, pleasure and peace of mind.
These are acts of radical liberation — these are our birth rights."
~ With Love, Fox Eros

Fox Eros, AMFT BBS #137653
Supervised by Patrice Bone: LMFT #93803
Employed by Therapy UnScripted: A Marriage & Family Therapy Corporation

* Land Acknowledgment - I honor the land I am on of the Chumash and Gabrielino-Tongva peoples

Verified on Psychology Today and  PolyFriendly.org

© 2025 by Fox Eros, Fox Eros in Love, The Polyamory Therapist is a division of
Therapy UnScripted: A Marriage & Family Therapy Corporation.'

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